The Popcorn is Popping, Take off Your Masks

It has been several years since I even felt like writing anything of substance. Seriously - ANYTHING. As a self-proclaimed writer who actually has been published, that is NOT procrastination, that is akin to languishing, which in writing terms means The Dead Sea. That's a hella writer's block with rebar twenty feet down and reinforced with bunker-type protection.

When I had a regular gig with a magazine, I had to write nearly every day to produce 50-100 word daily reflection pieces. Then when I was writing a feature article, I could whip out a 5,000 word article in nothing flat, but that was after many, many weeks of pondering and formulating.

My kids were younger then, and life came at me in snippets. I had a writing professor in college who produced her first volume of award-winning short stories by writing during cycles of laundry and when her children were napping. I could relate; I was so much more productive when I had only 30 minutes here or 15 minutes there.

But now, I have a high school freshman and a sixth grader, so my days are more my own, and other than chauffeur duties, more of my late afternoons and evenings are mine, too. Well, when I'm not attending this or that meeting or dealing with other nonsense like flooded laundry rooms and broken water softeners. After pressure from several of my peers (who KNEW that I would succumb to peer pressure at age 48?!), several months ago, I joined a popular social networking site.

Of course, friends tried to tell me how wonderful it was because there I could reconnect with friends from high school, share photos with family members, and generally stay plugged in with others. The first was NOT a selling point for me, given that I possessed no romantic, gilded memories of how high school was for me. I met some good people, stayed in touch with those I wanted to keep, and moved on.

Initially, I started out with less than a dozen contacts on said site, flying low under the radar so as not to draw fire. I made my profile private, and only my contacts could see my info and posts. Then, as is known to happen, fate intervened. I should say, she bit me on the ass. HARD. I was discovered by someone in my past, someone with whom I didn't mind reconnecting. One thing lead to anther, and then the floodgates burst. More people from my past, some with whom I did NOT share a personal history other than being high school classmates, connected to me. Suddenly, I was interconnected with the popular/cool kids, the beautiful/rich folks, and my clan, the geek artistic types. We were one big, internet-talking circle of fools.

I had no idea that one contact would shake me from my dearth of writing creativity. This person was definitely NOT a person with whom I was friends in school, my not being part of the cool/rich/beautiful crowd. And yet.....here we were as middle-aged adults sharing laughs and discovering that we really weren't that different from each other. In fact, if either of us had bothered to drop our masks back then, we wouldn't have wasted the past 34 years NOT being friends.

Why did I never bother to know that this person, who was popular, from a wealthy family, was in a steady relationship with another popular person, was shy like me? Was a lover of art and music and theater like me? Was just trying to fit in and finding it difficult to break out of a pre-shaped mold made up of expectations handed down from family.....JUST. LIKE. ME?

We can't expect that 14/15-year-olds are going to be as inwardly astute or keen to the complexities of interpersonal relationships and communication, but.......if we could have been just a bit less self-centered, we might have noticed that we weren't alone in our angst and awkwardness.

So, this person, this ONE person has personally and single-handedly brought the popcorn of my writing imagination to full pop mode. In just two days, I have written more words than I have in the past two years. Thanks, my friend, for taking off your mask. And for making me feel comfortable enough to take off mine, at least for just a little bit. I'm enjoying the feel of this new ocean, and I'm glad you're going to tread it with me.

Later daze...................